Friday, December 28, 2007

Still Missing

My sleep pattern is destroyed, or rather, my sleep is destroyed. Time that I managed to finally doze off is mostly during sunrise. It doesn't change even if I've only had 5 hours sleep the night before. Sometimes it can get frustrating but at most nights, I just stared at the ceiling calmly, waiting for my eyelid to get heavier.

These are the times when I think of Dad most. When everyone's in bed and when we would be having unhealthy late night supper in the dining room. Just me and him and no one else. We're the two owls in the family and see late night supper as one of the most important meal of a day. We talked and we laughed. I don't remember what we used to talk about but I know we could go on and on.

I dreamt of him on the Christmas morning for the second time. I've always wanted to dream of Dad and talk to him, I've so much to tell him. The dreams were disappointing because I realized, not for the first time, that I have no control over my dreams. I couldn't say to him what I have wanted to say. I pictured my dreams to be us talking to each, having a reciprocative conversation. But I shouldn't be complaining because at least I get to see him sometimes.

Festive season without Dad is different; late nights without Dad is very different.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Government Departments in Malaysia, BOLEH my arse!

I got up 1.5 hours later than I planned to and finally got to the National Registration Department in State, PJ to change the address on my identity card. So I was there about half past 11. I was told not to get there too early as you'll have to queue for a long time to get a number.

So it was my turn to get my number and this scruffy looking Malay officer took over the counter from the Indian officer that was serving the others.

"Hi, how are you? I'm here to change my address"
"Why you change address?" (what stupid question?)
"Because I've moved to a new place"
"Oh, you must bring your bill or bank statement to prove"
"I've no bill or statement that is under my name. Can I use my driver's license?"(I couldn't be f*cked coming again on another day)
"No, cannot! Mesti bring bills"
"But I don't have anything with my name, I don't live here, I live in Australia"
"Then why you wanna change address?"
"Because I'm a Malaysian, I've MyKad and I've moved so I'm here to change the address on my IC!"
That freak was in deep thought for about 3 seconds...
"Oh... itu macam. So now you wanna change your address kan? (f*cking, haven't I made myself clear enough?)
"Yes, so can I use my driver's license as prove?
"Yessss... cannnnnn..."
This very helpful officer then gave me a number, #289, just 121 people before me, fantastic!

To cut a long story short, the hungry, thirsty and sleepy me waited for 4 hours before I got to my turn. There were 7 counters for MyKad application but only 3 were open, however, at most times, there were only 1 or 2 counters providing their tortoise-speed service because half of the time they were either chatting with other officers, drinking whatever-shit from their coffee mug while snacking on biscuit, or at most time, went missing. And I wonder why I waited for 4 hours.

I've not much of patience and they were definitely pushing my limit.

So I got to the counter, told myself that they were just doing their job and they probably were trying their best to help us get through this shit as soon as possible. So I smiled and greeted him. But that f*cking idiot was trying to compete with a 100-year-old turtle to see who was slower. Then that very smart officer who gave me my number had so much free time in hand and was not qualified to process application, he came to chat with the one processing my application. By now, the cranky bitch had taken over my body and I cracked it...

"Look, I had waited for 4 hours because you guys have been missing from your desk whenever you feel like. Now you're at work so if you wanna talk, get these done quickly so you can finish up and talk as much as you want!"

I was ready for him to fire back at me but f*cking hell, all they did was looked at me for a second, talk shit for another few seconds before getting back to my application, totally unfazed. What the hell!? They were trying to annoy me further, or they had absolutely no idea what I was going on about. Aaaarrrggghhh... these freaks!!! I just don't understand why they are so slow, even when they walk, holy crap! Has it gotta do with their diet? Lack of certain protein from this particularly important meat?

You peeps better not have to change address or lose your I.D. If you do, best of luck to you! I'll have to go to the immigration department to renew my passport tomorrow, they better not make me scream.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Merry X'mas 07

Today's traffic was surprisingly light. No last minute Christmas shoppers getting stuck in crawling traffic into 1-Utama's carpark. No long queues at Jusco supermarket after my grocery shopping. No annoying kids running into me. I assume a lot of fellow KLites have taken this 6-day long weekend opportunity to get out of town.

Our plan for tonight is to have all-night-long hotpot, suggested by the ever-so-smart yours truly. I came up with the plan on Christmas Adam and everyone at home was telling me... you won't get anything from the supermarket in the last minutes; the traffic's gonna kill you; let's just eat out; you can try going but am sure you'll end up calling and say you can't get anything...

Hmmphh! I'm so proud of myself.

my boyfriend is the best

I've got the most wonderful boyfriend on earth, and he has just turned a year older. Although we're miles apart, I trust we're firmly in our hearts. I was supposed to be stuck in Melbourne during this Christmas-New Year holiday and apparently, he couldn't get tickets home. Found out last week that he had actually planned a surprise trip home for me and his family, but my Dad gave us a bigger surprise. As much as I would love to spend his birthday, Christmas and new year with him in Melbourne, I would rather stick with my family here. Guess staying close with my family at this time is the only thing that keep us sane.

Candyman was with me when Dad left us. He changed his plan, left work early and hopped on the first available flight to be with us. He managed to say goodbye to Dad, and that meant a lot to him. Out of anyone's expectation, Candyman's hand was grabbed the hardest when he reassured Dad that he'll take good care of me, although Dad was already unconscious. I'm glad that he was aware of our presence. I hope Dad has left his worries about me behind because I won't let him down.

I don't know how I was going to get through the first couple of days without Candyman by my side. He was there to support me when I was too weak to hold myself up; to tell me that it is okay to cry because that will make me feel better; to listen and talk to me when I couldn't sleep at night; to guide me when I was dreadfully shocked and lost; to make me comprehend what had happened and I can grieve but I've to accept it. He was just there when I needed him, that was very sweet and I really appreciate it.

Candyman was also been an angel to my family and relatives, by being around with us and trying his very best to accommodate to our tradition and culture. He had to cancel two business trips in the last minutes so he could be with us. Just what can I say about this man that has done so much for me? I know I've not been the best girlfriend who had her hissy fit whenever she feels like, who sometimes played too much and got a little irresponsible. Candyman definitely deserves the Best Boyfriend award, if there's such. I love this man who makes me laugh, who makes me cry, who wouldn't give in when I'm being unreasonable, who melts my heart, to death. I hope he's feeling the same way too.

Next year, he has promised.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Baby Chloe

This little thing brings joy to our family in time of sorrow. She loves the musical mat that I bought her. She grabbed my finger tightly with her tiny little fingers and stared at me with her big beautiful eyes when I taught her how to shake her bon bon. She's an angel sent from God.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

all I want for Christmas is...

to have another chance to spend it with my family and that consists of dad, mum, brother, sister-in-law, and baby Chloe. I know this will never ever happen again and I need to understand that, and help each other in the family to comprehend that. It happened so unexpectedly I almost couldn't grasp. I wasn't expecting my return for a wedding would turned into the funeral of the most important man in my life.

Some mornings I woke up asking myself if I've just had a nightmare that lasted for what seemed to be a week. Some mornings I woke up forgetting what had happened but realized not acknowledging facts doesn't mean I can change the so-called reality. And many mornings I woke up reminding myself that I've to be stronger than yesterday because I need to be and my family wants me to be; my dad wanted us to be happy and keep our chins up, so I will.

I feel blessed for my dad to be able to migrate, like he liked to say, to a better place with no pain. He left very peacefully after having a last look at us. I'm very glad that he didn't go through much pain and struggle although I can't stop wishing that he could stay with us for a little longer. My dad is the most important man in my life, giving me the best he could offer, 26 years of good memories and his irreplaceable love. I can no longer be a brat and ask for more this time, can I?

I know tomorrow would be an easier day than today. Most importantly I need to be strong for mum because while we've lost our father, she has lost her life partner who she has spent most of her life with. Tomorrow has to be an easier day for everyone, by no choice.

Dear friends who have been calling and texting me, that's very thoughtful of you guys. I'm sorry for not picking up calls or replying to texts, I'm not avoiding anyone. I'm just tired and am not in the right head space to chat. I know you guys are calling with good intentions but give me a couple of more days. I promise to catch up when I'm ready. It has been a long 10 days and in case I don't speak to you guys before that, Merry Christmas and Happy 2008.

Friday, November 30, 2007

I've lost my waist again

I was getting ready to go to Seven, slipped into my skinny jeans that, thank goodness, can still fit but BIG hello to love handles. Put on a top and looked at the mirror. Holy shit, what have I done to myself??? I'm back for less than 3 weeks and I've put on so much. Thanks to the you-know-who friends, whose only interests in life are eating and drinking, aaarrrgghhh... I'm so upset with myself.

I've to be a stronger person, say no to excessive eating!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Bintan is Overrated

So what did we do in Bintan?

We climbed the rocks. We had 2 dinners in 3 hours' time. We slept a lot. We played with each other.

Bintan is nothing when you've just been to paradise. The beach was so-so but I would not swim in there at all, no way. So Candyman took me to the other end of the beach where there were rocks and we climbed to my so-called middle of the sea. I had probably scared a huge lizard in glamourous green to death by screaming so loud when we met.
This place is a rip off as everything was over-priced in SGD. Some people were raving about how great their massage was but let me tell you, it was pretty ordinary and they charged us SGD30 per hour for only a back massage, pfffttt! The place that I went to below his place charges SGD45 for an hour for full body, and there are heaps of cheaper places down the road, I just wanted a nearer one that is a little more fancy than the others, and they really give good traditional chinese massage.

Dinner at the resort was shit and we almost walked out of the Thai restaurant without paying because service was so bad, everyone in the restaurant were stuffed from impatience and frustration. So we took a shuttle to their Indonesian restaurant for our second dinner of the night. Oh, we stayed at Nirwana Resort Hotel, one of the four different accommodations they provide in their huge guarded area. You're basically caged in this holiday resort where you can choose to stay in their resort hotels, chalets or villas, where they have about 10 different restaurants and bars and various other service like SPA, and they take your around in their free shuttle. Aaarrggghhh... I felt so trapped in this so called heaven that didn't give me anything heavenly except for my man.

I couldn't help but asked every Singaporean that I met after my return what is so great about Bintan. These are the answer I've gotten...
1) It's less than an hour's boat ride from Singapore
2) HEARD that they've nice beach
3) HEARD that they've good cheap massage
4) Everyone goes there

I can tell you, all the above are not true except for point #1.

I had a good time with Candyman regardless, it's always good to have him around. He arranged and booked for this romantic weekend getaway and I really appreciate it. We know it is always good when we're together.

Boracay was our paradise

I had never heard of Boracay Island when he first suggested to me, while considering between Perhentian with Mr and Mrs P, Tioman and Bali. So I did a search and it turned out to be one of the top 10 beaches in the world. Being a sucker for all things beautiful and new, of course I wanted to go.

So his Filipino friend gave us some pointers on which domestic airline to take and which part of the beach we should stay. I found the tickets from KL - Manila. He sorted out the tickets from Manila - Caticlan, booked accommodation that has air-conditioning, hot water (I insisted) and in Station 1 (recommended by his friend and no shit - best beach on the island). We were ready to be in paradise.
Beginning of the trip - pale + pale.

I love the beach but I used to be afraid of swimming in the sea, reason being I can't see clearly what's underneath and my wild imagination takes my mind too far away and that had always stopped me from swimming in the sea. I used to only 'play' in the water in the sea, tan on the beach but swim in the pool. Inn Boracay, however, especially where we stayed, had the clearest sea water I've ever seen, looked just like drinking water. For the first time in my life, with the clear water and most importantly Candyman by my side, I conquered my fear and swam in the sea, for at least two hours a day. I was a little scared on the first day but I gradually got used to the water and by the last few days, I was comfortable enough to move away from Candyman for more than 3 meters. Yes, for such a big girl, I'm that timid in the sea.
As clear as drinking water.

Besides the perfect aquamarine sea water, there was the powder white sand that felt so soft on your skin. Where we stayed had the best sand with no corals at all, while Station 2 and 3 had heaps and they weren't white sand. I didn't quite understand why as they were all along the same coast but Candyman explained to me that the gradient was different at different part of the island so the quality of sand is different (Baby, you're so ssshhhmarrt!!!). We thought Boracay is the best beach that we've ever been, and mind you, he's a beach junkie and he's recently been to Phi Phi Island and Krabi. It's really as beautiful as the pictures in those advertising brochure.
My Baby being a baby

So we've done so much in that 6 days by doing nothing. We had no mobile with us at most times, no time, no work, no worries but we had each other, lots of loving, kisses and hugs, and quality time spent together. We ate when we were hungry, we swam till we needed rest, long walks on the beach till I complained about the corals hurting my sole, we had massage in the cabana by the beach at dusk, we had early nights and early mornings, we had the most polite and humble people around the resort providing their best service, we found out that we share the same favourite animal, we saw a lot of Koreans couples in matching outfit, we...
Spot the couples. Freaking funny.

There was a day where we were having so much fun under the clear blue sky, we forgot about time and by time we got back, we looked like lobster couple. That's the only evening that we didn't get a massage but we layered lots and lots of shea butter on each other's back and more calendula cream on our faces instead. We were annoyed and we were in pain but we laughed every time when we looked at each other. After my skin peeled, I managed to keep my tan although it was a shade or two fairer but my man turned totally white again, poor baby...
Before I got burnt and I was turning brown gradually.

There was a day where we went sunrise sailing and we had to get up at 4am in the morning. I didn't look very enthusiastic at the beginning but when we saw the first light, we thought all effort was worthwhile. I then turned all chirpy and chatty till something hit me - my hunger. I was then whimpering and frowning so he had to tell the boatman to take us back but I'm sure I wasn't the only hungry person!!!

Trying to look perky in the too early morning.

There was also a day where we hired a boat to go around the island and to snorkel. I had a ball looking at the colourful fishes until I felt sick. I tried to tell myself that I wasn't but I was terribly sick. So he got me back on the boat and I asked him to keep snorkeling (we've paid so we, or at least he, should play as much as he could). Sea sick got worse and I started throwing up into the sea. Then he came to check on me and I was feeding the fishes with my breakfast for the y-time, so he said we had to head back, pffftt! I felt really bad and embarrassed but grateful for his decision. Sigh... who on earth gets motion sickness from snorkeling?
Back from snorkeling, chucking and surviving!

And then there came the day when we had to say goodbye to Boracay and I was whining like a 12-year-old saying that I didn't wanna leave. Every night before I dozed off, "there's only xy days left, can we turned back time", was one of the few lines that I mumbled.

He and his book.

The beachside cabana that we loved - we chilled on the hammock, dined and had our daily massage here.

The place we stayed at that was literally next to the beach, bliss!

End of trip - pale + brown

We're now back to the painful real world but I know where I wanna go next, hihi...

Friday, November 23, 2007


Dear Candyman,

I miss waking up next to you in the morning, feeling rather grumpy (half of the time I was pretending) so you would kiss me and cuddle me and make me smile. I was having a ball during the three weeks that we spent together, laughing at our own SAC/OWL jokes, stuffing our faces with food and more food, me crying for stupid reasons and wanting you to give me hugs and kisses, too-many-but-not-enough kisses a day, long walks and slow talks. I love it when you play with my hair, when you kiss me in the middle of the night when I'm sleeping, when you hate spending time in malls but you would go shopping with me, when you tell me that you love me.

Do you miss having breakfast with your sweet girlfriend before going to work, and come home to the same hot girl who jumps around the apartment like a kid, who makes a lot of noise and talk too much, who goes crazy when she sees food, who has her PMS whenever she feels like?

Even at times when we argued, I still loved you. We're still learning about each other and we get upset and frustrated at times like these because we care for each other and for our relationship. We could've just left everything behind and walk away but we chose to solve the issues and in fact, we've grown closer to each other after every fight.

I miss you so much, can you be back soon and play with your hyperactive girlfriend? I promise to have less PMS and share my bed with you, but you've to promise me to have chili chicken, spicy prawn, fish, beef and beer duck with me. And if you cook for me, I'll massage you. If you take me to the country, I'll not party for a weekend. If you sing and dance for me, I won't throw up but I can't promise not to laugh. If you spend more time teaching me to swim better, I'll go with you to the deeper sea. Deal or no deal?

I'll see you in about 2 weeks' time. Hope things are going as planned and you should book your tickets soon. Hopefully you'll take me to the zoo in my dreams tonight. Love you!

Your cute girlfriend,
Captain Grumpyp.s. Candyman is not allowed to read my blog and I trust he won't cheat.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Back in Melbourne

My apartment is a 2-star motel because I'm only here to sleep and shower. It's 2-star because there's no trained cleaners to make the apartment up everyday, hence the huge mess. It has reached another brand new level of mess. This has taught me a lesson - you'll be surprise at how much more you can achieve after you thought you can't go any further.

I was out 3 hours after I touched down and have never been home. There's not a night that I get home before 3am, and there are days when I got home when people started going to work or when people were going for lunch. I've got a new addiction - gin rummy a.k.a. pok kuat (PK). I love the game so much that I'm thinking about it again now. So excuse the PK addict for not maintaining this blog but I promise I'll be back active very quickly. I've gotten my new Powerbook Pro Leopard and once I get all software installed, I'll be a computer hog again.

But now, I've to decide whether to have drinks at Golden Monkey, clean my apartment or to go back to get more sleep.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Am in Kiasuland

Us at Linkin Park's Singapore 07

Four cities in four weeks, hence the sabbatical on this page. Been really busy, catching up lost time with Candyman, while I didn't get to catch up with anyone in KL. Then I was terribly sick for a couple of days, that annoyed the shit out of me as that had wasted another few precious days of mine in KL. Mum was making noise, that I've spent more time with Candyman than with her, I'm a terrible daughter, I know.

Linkin Park on Tuesday night was a blast. The crowd was a little flat but their performance rocked. Flying out tonight (after several delays) and my weekend's a continuation of drinking, concert, more food and goss-ing. Will definitely be back to share my wonderful past 4 weeks.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Complaints from KL

Last night was a blast! All of us were smashed, ALL I believe. I had problem standing straight. Dinner at El Cerdo was delish and Mambo rocked! Will post pictures and updates later. When I say later, it probably means very much later.

Since I've joined the caffeine-kick club, I've discovered a problem in KL. There's no good coffee in town! Maybe I've not discovered enough but so far, I've not had a single cup of decent coffee, be it at 6-star hotel like Mandarin Oriental, or cafe like Delicious. And many places don't do soy, pfftt! So I've to resolved to Starbucks - the international coffee chain that serves terrible coffee, that I refuse to step foot into in Melbourne, and if I do, it's for their wi-fi service or at times of desperation. So I had to spend a good 12 bucks at Starbucks and the coffee was still bad, damn it! Can you guys please tell me where can I get a decent, heart-warming cup of soy latte? James told me this cafe at Pavilion makes some decent coffee comparable to Melbourne's but I'm not desperate enough to drive all the way down town to get one.

Speaking of which, I can't believe myself. Another wrinkle just popped up this afternoon under the tremendous stress that I had to deal with on the KL roads of unclear road signs, constant changes and rude drivers. My journey to Mandarin Oriental that usually takes 20 minutes turned out to be a 1.5 hour drive around town. I missed a few turnings and came across a freeway that has 6 lanes with 6 different signs in my face and cars around were flying so I was too scared to slow down but I had no freaking idea which lane I should be on. God damn it! I called my brother for about 40 times to ask for direction and he has finally realized that I'm a dumb blonde who constantly dye my hair black. So I got to my hairdresser an hour late. Coming home was another heart-racing experience with cars cutting lanes with half a second notice and all these new tunnels and roads that I took, hoping that they'll take me to where I want to be because you shouldn't really believe the signs.

Madam Kwan's food sucks big time and tonight would be my last visit ever. Things that were suppose to be spicy turned sweet and salty turned bland. I've Eleana to prove that I wasn't being fussy, they have a problem. It was almost disgusting, yucks!

Good things finally happened after dinner. Got a pair of new Alexander McQueen's shades within 15 minutes. It has became my routine to get a pair of shades every time I come back to Malaysia. Last year I got two pairs because I came back twice so this year, hurhurhur... Walked into this shop where the owner was an old party acquaintance of mine. She was the wild party girl years ago, chic, funky, sexy and had her fair share of throwing away her stand after a night's use. She, however, has turned into a hardworking retail owner, happy wife and a soon-to-be mother! She has settled and she's happy. I'm really happy for her. Got some clothes from her with a little discount, great clothes. Would love to check it out again the week after I return from the beach, when they've new arrivals again.

I've packed my clothes for the coming week's holiday. Baby was reminding me AGAIN to be aware of the baggage weight. Well, I paid a hundred bucks in Melbourne airport for excess baggage. That's ridiculous! So this time, I'm not gonna bring a lot. It's a beach holiday after all, I don't need much. Oh dear, I can't wait!

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

I'm Home

I've not finished my work and I'm not in the mood to go out and play either. I just wanna curled up in bed and watch Channel V. Enjoy the company of my family and look at baby Chloe. Listen to my iPod while taking my long relaxing bath and play solitaire. Stop all arguments and let Friday arrives sooner. Work finishes by itself and the fat around my tummy disappear magically, so I will look great in my bikini.

Can these happen?

Friday, October 12, 2007

I've been blogging less, I know

I'm still alive but I'm vanishing, that's how I feel really. Someone asked me why I've not been forwarding her great-to-kill-time-at-work junk mails. Then another asked me why I've not been blogging. Some asked why I've not been posting pictures.

I'm not in the mood - I'm so broke I've problem going out this weekend.

I'm not feeling well - I slept for 24 out of 30 hours yesterday and if I didn't force myself to get up, I could've slept for another 24 hours but I was too anal to die in my sleep without anyone noticing.

I'm dying from too much work - I'm going back to KL for holidays in a few days time and it's the end of semester. I WAS wishing to wrap everything up before I leave but looking at the extremely slow rate that I'm going, I'm bringing my books home with me, &^%$^&#(& !!!

I'm semi-addicted to Facebook - I'm getting better as I don't play with my pets anymore, or Tetris-ing but when I've free time, I'll check my Facebook before I read junk mails or blog, booo... p.s. can someone please tell me how can I stop those notification from clogging up my mailbox? They are freaking annoying!

I'm really busy - things in my life happens faster than I can blog so sometimes I've so much to tell yet I don't know where to begin and where to end. So I tend to blog when I feel intensely against something, resulting in friends assuming that I'm not happy in life. Not true, not true. They are just snippets of my world which I happen to jot down.

So just a quick flashback at what I've done...

I've tried many new restaurants in the past few weeks - Kenzan, Wabi-Sabi Bistro, Interlude, Yu-u, Nobu, and return to my favourites and that includes Dainty! Been partying and getting smashed a lot, inclusive of one Wednesday night when I surprisingly found my way home at almost 6am; being bread thief with Alice and later she attempted to rape me with bread but failed; rocking up to Watermark at 3am because I couldn't sleep; got smashed from James Squire then had a CRAFT (Can't Remember A F*cking Thing as coined by DJ Coming) night at Watermark, followed by drunk dialing and pissed Candyman off big time, as in, BIG BIG time; Godskitchen 2007 with the best visual and elevated DJ console ever; attended a Bollywood Ball where I played Snow White; and more drinking and getting drunk on week nights and weekends.

But nothing beats my upcoming holiday with Candyman. Sun, sea and my man, here I come! Tickets are booked, domestic flight and accommodation will be sorted out soon. That's the only thing that keeps me awake working.

Sunday, October 07, 2007

Men, sigh

Men and women can never be equal. To begin with, we don't function the same. I would love not to generalize but from my little experience, I am starting to notice yet hate the differences. Women have PMS I admit and that causes unpredictable mood swing. I have to say women aren't the best bosses on earth. Because I'm a woman, so I'll say - get a grip!

One thing I can't understand and accept about men is how they can lock the world out, especially from people who care about them, when they are upset. I absolutely understand that they can only deal with it later but turning off the phone, not picking up calls, not replying to emails and sms isn't the best way to solve problem. Running away from the issue would only make things worse, in my point of view. Most importantly, I think it is very selfish for them to just leave the other party hanging there, suffering the pain while the man is doing his own thing before he can deal with them it. I know the man is hurt too but why cause more pain on the other person by turning away from the person who loves and cares for you?

And one thing that really pisses me off - the man can fall asleep in the middle of an argument, and think that things would be better when the sun comes up, that things would be easier to be solved after a good big breakfast. Geez... I can't go to bed upset or angry, and I don't like it. I get angrier when I can't sleep thinking about the unresolved issues while the person that is partially responsible for the problem is fast asleep like any other night.

I've finally remembered why I used to run away from relationships. They are so consuming, so much hard work. Yet, I choose to stay in one because I believe I've met this person who is worth all these hard work. After all, this is what I've been looking for - sweep me off my feet, consuming, inconvenient yet make me happy kinda love.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Bad Day

The first time had finally hit us. Call it an argument, or not. What I'm sure of is that the both of us are going to bed unhappy. Well, at least one of us can sleep, while I can't stop thinking about it. I'm not good with words, especially when I'm upset with something. My words can sometimes be harsh and crude. So tonight I chose to keep my words, merely because I'm learning to be a better girlfriend/person, and to act more mature in an adult relationship. I was thinking perhaps I'll be more subtle after a day or two and discussion will be more fruitful.

So the issues were all over my face and in my voice but I didn't put them in words. He had no idea why I was behaving in such behaviour and had decided to give up asking and went to bed instead. I later realized I couldn't hold my anger anymore and I wanted to spill but it was too late. Honestly, I don't know if it's me, or him.

I wanted pizza for dinner but the good pizza place from the delivery menu wasn't open. I hung up and tried my best to find the second best for the evening on the menu. I decided on fish burger and calamari and it was the same guy who picked up my call, the fish & chips restaurant that I picked from their delivery menu for the second time has shut down. I said thank you and thought maybe I should just starve myself to death tonight since I'm so bad with luck but that friendly boy on the other end of the receiver was very sweet. He told me that I can hang on to the call and we can both work together in choosing something for dinner.

So we agreed on this particular restaurant and the menu was extensive. I couldn't help but muttered... "f*cking hell, I hate choices on days like these"

Yeah, I had a problem when I'm given choices. Our conversation lead on to what I had for dinner last night. Pizza it was (oh yeah, Ladro's were the best in town!). So he said I shouldn't have pizza again but I wanted some. He also recommended me the beef burger as I was about to order burger before. I ended up ordering a pizza, a humongous burger and saganaki. I couldn't finish either one of them. They are still on my dining table.

I needed to talk to someone tonight, but I couldn't think of anyone that I felt like speaking to. Don't we just hate one of these days, where everything seems to be wrong, and decision can be so difficult?

Monday, October 01, 2007

I'm Rarely Bored

I've got this habit of deleting contacts from my phone book when I'm bored, or when I choose to be bored. When this happens, I discover one after another names on the list that I've no faintest idea of who they are. They probably don't know me, and neither do I. The person who made friends with these people has to be the alcohol in me.

I got so bored, I sent a text to this historical friend of mine, Whirlpool to check if he's still alive. He is no more in Melbourne but he tried contacting me in January. Okay, that was 9 months ago. I am a bad friend. There's no reply till now so I assume, Whirlpool has either changed his number, or he's ignoring me. I refuse to think that he's out of this world, things as such can't happen that easily.

So I said no to dinner then I got bored at home. I wanted to get out of the apartment and I started calling some friends at half-past-eight. As I've expected, everyone was either in the midst of meal, or had already finished. Then I thought of Confuse, my ex-boyfriend who used to dine me every night at about 10pm because he would be at the gym at normal dinner hours. Well, even he was having dinner at a normal time tonight. These are the times when I tell myself, I want someone here with me.

I've 45 minutes to decide on what delivery shall I order before I lose my last choice for the evening. Unless someone wants to have supper with me.

Friday, September 28, 2007


I think Tetris is therapeutic, especially when I've got the killer PMS, like now. Haven't got this for a long time. Wei Liang was telling me, "when women get her PMS, they should go to sleep, or go shopping". Oh yeah, sounds simple but dude, where's the money to shop? Ask the men to pay for the bills and all problem might be solved.

I've started my dream diary from the 25th of September. For some reasons, I see the need to get in touch with my dreams, that they could be symbolic. Like you already know, I've weird dreams every night. The out-of-no-where, make-no-sense, faces-I've-never-seen and nonsensical-storyline kinda dreams. Candyman said I can publish a book in the future, with a collection of my weirdest of the weird dreams.

Aaarrrggghhh... I'm so not in the mood to do anything. Not even to go out. This mood swing is irritating the shit out of me and forget about asking me to control my temper and emotion, it's not working. So I played Tetris. That's the only thing that can take my mind off nonsense and calm me down, for a short moment.

No wonder TY thinks we girls need anger management class.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Relationship, ahhh...

I was looking through my undergrads assignments this afternoon, hoping to find some useful information that will help me in my current studies, but no, nothing related. Anyway, I found these essays which reminded me that I've once took this very interesting elective unit of behavioral studies, namely Human Relationship & Interpersonal Communications. I was ecstatic because I remembered this is the one and only unit that I had gotten all D and H.D for all assignments *giggle*

So I started reading what I had written and all these demand-withdraw pattern, relational maintenance and all different terms and theories came to mind. This got me curled up in bed and began to think about relationship.

Relationship. I looked at my past failed relationships and asked myself, how did I manage to make so much sense in those essays? I've my fair share of heartbreaks and heart-breakings (aaarrrgghh... karma, karma!), had been into f*cked-up relationships and am still learning how to not screw things up. They can be so easily put on papers but when it comes to practise... *roll eyes*

Relationship. Easy to give your friends advice on what to do and what not to do but always do the opposite when I'm in trouble. Sometimes I surprise myself with the most sensible advice given to my friends but when others advised me when I needed help, I could't hear a thing. I blindly did them my way, pffft!

Relationship. It had happened that when I had one, I wanted to get out of it. There were times when I was looking for one yet it kept hiding away from me. There were times when I was trying to hide myself but it couldn't stop chasing after me. There were times when we had a pact where we would take a break from each other and enjoy ourselves, it was awesome. Then this is also the time where we've decided that it's time to reunite.

Relationship. I thought I got into a ridiculous one but it makes me smile, it makes my heart all warm and fuzzy and it gives me strength. So, it's not that bad. In fact, being with someone who's not with you all the time makes it a stronger relationship because it is based mostly on emotional connection. I believe we will build a strong foundation that will take us a long way. See, it makes a non-believer (of long distance relationship) believes!

Relationship. I thought my problem was big but when you look around you, everyone has their problems. Some are small little problems that are too easy to solve, some allowed it to snowball to a huge one. Some hold on to each other and destroy the snowball, some walk away from each other. Some wants to step on the snowball and let it melt but have not enough strength without the support of the other.

It has never been easy, and it shouldn't be easy, but they are part of life. It's all hard work and for those who needs help, I can lend you my text book but let me tell you... theory and practice don't quite match.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Don't Forget that Smile

I love the smell of chemical that comes with the steam when you open up your dishwasher to a clean load of dishes. Many say using the dishwasher isn't environmental, the washing tablets are not biodegradable and all the toxic bla bla story shit. I've accustomed to almost not washing a single mug. I believe washing is too much work.

I also love the feel of fresh warm laundry from the dryer with that mild sweet scent. Getting the clothes out of the dryer is the best part of doing one's laundry I believe. Some say it is also not very environmental while it puts my electricity bill up. I think it's too much work to hang my clothes out in the balcony, and then take them in.

I love going to bed knowing that I don't have to get up early the following day. For some reasons, I don't sleep well when I know I've got an AM start the next day. The more important the appointment is, the more restless I would get. Most of the time I'll end up tossing and turning in bed and waking up every other hour to check on the time. Uncannily, the alarm has to set off when I finally doze off, gggrrrhhh...

I enjoy coming home to a made bed. It just makes you feel calmer and more lifted. Well, generally coming home to a cleaned, organized apartment is great, always great. Not to forget to leave the windows open for fresh air, and blinds up for sunlight. Bliss.

It is these small little things in daily life that makes me happy. Guess they are rewards sent from above praising my hard work - putting dishes in to washer, transferring laundry from washer to dryer, making my bed, amongst others. There always should be a brighter side and I wish I will always smile a little in stinky situation that is generally life.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Mr. and Mrs. Liaw

Congratulations to June and Desmond, they are now Husband and Wife. It was a lovely ceremony accompanied by great family, friends and beautiful weather. As far as I can remember, this is the first wedding that I've attended without being on the verge of shedding happy tears. They were just too funny and we were all amused.

I got all attention from the guests by embarrassingly making a dash into the waiting room, panting, sweating and panicking. I thought I was late. I was such an idiot, let me tell you. I was already late being in traffic on chocker-everyday Collin Street. When the taxi driver stopped me at the corner of Spring and Collin, which was exactly where I should've gotten off, I told him to keep going towards the north of Spring.

He reminded me that I'm suppose to be at Treasury Building and that's where I should get off. I was more than confident and I told him to not worry, I know where I wanna go. Fine. So I got off 2 blocks later, by giving him a fat tip because I had no time to waste for change. I crossed the road, stared at the Parliament and told myself, that's not where I wanna go! I don't know what I was thinking but I knew I was late. So I ran, literally ran like I was being chased by a monster in my maxi dress and sandals. I made it there before the ceremony began, phew!

It's Saturday night and I'm home. I want to stick to this pattern in the future.

Got home from dinner and realized I've forgotten to leave the balcony door open for fresh air. So the sweet scent of the oriental lilies welcomed me home instead. Then I thought of Candyman. Every evening when we came home, he would be whinging about how my apartment is like an ice room, followed by demanding a big hug from me before shutting the balcony door. That put a smile on my face. If he was with me tonight, he would be jumping in joy for the warmed apartment.

He is, once again, right. I don't have to miss him because he's always with me, in my heart.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Steph tagged me

5 things in my handbag/bag :
mobile phone
lip balm
keys (either home or car)
hand cream

5 things in my purse :
driver's license
credit card
bank card

favourite things in my favourite room (my living room):
my powerbook
my stereo
my red couch
my coffee table that doubles as leg rest
my flowers in the vase

things I would like/love to do :
ski in Japan
Christmas in Fiji
massage every 5 days
be punctual
attend Bikram yoga religiously

5 things I’m currently doing :
listening to classical music
contemplating if I should have supper
drinking herbal tea

I'm tagging all bloggers who read my blog. For non-bloggers who are as bored as I am now, send them out in an email.

*** *** ***

Found a place in Carlton that sells fresh flowers for half of the price I was paying. They are looking good and it's these small little things in everyday life that put a smile on my face. Hope smiling and laughing too much won't bring those crow's feet to my life quicker than they should.

Making a trip to the cinema was all worth it for Ratatouille. It has became one of my favourite animated movie. It's about food, about friendship, about family, about love, about passion, about achieving your dreams, about cute little rats and nerdy chef-wannabe, it's about you going to watch it yourself. Pre-movie dinner at The Brasserie completed the fabulous gastronomic evening that we had.

I'll try to sleep again. Sweet dreams, peeps!

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

I Believe

Cried all my way from the airport to home, I'm stupid in ways like these. Candyman was right, and I knew he was right, that this is not goodbye, this is just the beginning. A beginning that requires a lot of effort, trust, belief, discipline, confidence, honesty, persistence and most importantly, love. To make this already tough job harder - it takes two to tango, pffftt! Just why did I choose this path? I can't say no to my heart.

So I'm home alone in my apartment, unwilling to go to bed. Who's gonna hug me to sleep and keep me warm? Who's gonna tell me that there's no monster when I've nightmare? Whose alarm is gonna annoy the shit outta me when it rings at 7.30am? Who's gonna talk shit with me when I can't fall asleep? Who's gonna give me the biggest kiss before he goes to work and the biggest hug in the evening? Who's gonna play with me?

I can't stop whinging about how life is a bitch and how it is unfair and how karma is here chasing after me and how I think I'm crazy. I know I'll be fine when I wake up tomorrow. It's not the end but a beautiful beginning.

We'll be fine. 208.

Friday, September 14, 2007

At Almost 3am

As we were both deep in sleep in each other's arms, I got woken up by this wet patch on the sheets when my leg rolled over it. It was definitely quite a big patch of water and it was cold. I freaked and got up speaking in the calmest tone I managed to pull...

"baby, did you pee in bed?"
"no..." he murmured.
"why is the bed wet?" frowning I was.
"it's not, silly girl" while attempting to pull me back to his arms.
"no! Baby, did you have wet dreams?" this time I was staring at him in darkness.
"what? no!" his words were getting clearer after my voice got louder.

I turned on the lights that made the both of us squinted, while pulling the doona off him. He had no choice but to examine the wet spot with me while I couldn't stop myself from yellng...

"baby!!!! you peed in bed, you peed in bed!!!"

He frowned while muttering repeatedly... "baby, I didn't."

So we stared at the spot, touched it, smelled it, and true enough, it wasn't pee or the second assumption that I had made. It was strange and he was determined to find out what was that. The silly me started to think that my place was haunted again and for a second, I was too scared to go to the bathroom alone. After some further investigation by him, the answer was sweat.

"sweat??!! this much? this wet?" I was in disbelief although I had to believe.
"baby, what d'you think sweat is?"

Fine, fine, fine, went back to sleep as long as neither of us peed in bed. Later in the night only we realized, my poor Candyman was having a temperature. One moment he was freezing and felt like he was trapped in a 4degree room, the next moment he felt like he was burning and was breaking into sweat. And he was right, sweat was like water and his side of the bed was soaked. He told me in the morning that he couldn't believed I thought he peed in bed and that I was so certain. Then he said he won't pee in bed and since he was 4 months old, he knew how to make his way to the loo.

Bwahahahahaha... that cracked me up big time and had just made my Friday a pleasant one.


Thursday, September 13, 2007

it would still be a YES

Hello 99!

Things are getting better after letting them off my chest. Lots of tears but it also brings us more laughter from deep within after. Outcome is basically a positive one but to be honest with myself, I can forgive but I can't forget. Well, I guess I wouldn't give two f*cks if I don't have such strong feelings for this person. Things always work like a scale, lotsa hard work to balance it up.

When I looked into his eyes, I had the answer for everything, although he did break my heart. Sometimes I asked myself, what have I done to deserve a chance to meet this wonderful person? Then I realized it isn't a gift, it is my own karma comes biting on my back. God made me meet him, someone so right, someone that I truly want to be with yet I can't. I've always told myself and everyone around me that long distance relationships are crap and they can never ever work, and now I'm falling head over heels for someone 8 hours flight away, fanf*ckingtastic! Eat my own poisonous words. Serves me perfectly right.

For the past 6 months, I go a little crazy from time to time, because my heart and head couldn't agree with each other. One tells me that I should give it a go while the latter screamed "ridiculous" at me. So many drunken phone conversations with my ludicrous suggestions or confession of the heart across the globe. I started to think that maybe I should admit myself to the mental hospital.

This time when I see him again, when we get to spend hours and hours together, to go to bed and wake up to each other, I finally am able to sum all these up. I want this person to be in my life and I want it bad. I care for this person more than I should. My feelings for this person is so strong it scares the shit outta me. It's been a long time I allow my heart to feel and being the mummy of my heart, I sort of want to protect it from getting hurt.

Geez... only if I've not stepped into the farewell party by mistake, my life would probably be simpler. Yet when I slipped under the doona in the middle of the night and looked at this man who held my hands so tight and told me not to leave him in his sleep, I told myself - I'm glad that I've met you and if God turns back time, I'm crashing your farewell party one more time!

Monday, September 10, 2007

I Need a Miracle

You know how at many times, where you know something is true, but it really breaks your heart when you hear the words coming from the person that you really care about? On top of that, you have strong feelings for this person. Do you know how you thought you can cope with heartbreak and you think you're prepared for the worst but when it actually happens, you feel like you might not be able to pull yourself together ever again? Do you also know that disappointment can result in a lot of tears?

If it was other people, which I'm not sure I wish he is or not, I could've walked away without ever having to think. If we're both in the same place, I am sure none of these nonsense would happen. If I didn't have expectations, I won't get disappointments.

Sometimes I wished time would stop for the both of us, at the moment where I knew it was the purest, where I looked into the eyes and myself is the only thing I see, where I've no doubt about us. Unfortunately, I can't stop time and I can't change people. Then I wished I could turn back time, so I get to choose again.

I'm torn. Life's no doubt a bitch! But cheers to 70 hours anyway.

Last Request by Paolo Nutini
Slow down, lie down
Remember it's just you and me
Don't sell out, bow out
Remember how this used to be
I just want you to know something, is that alright?
Baby let's get closer, tonight

Grant my last request and just let me hold you, don't shrug your shoulders
Lay down beside me
Sure I can accept that we're going nowhere
But one last time let's go there
Lay down beside me, ohhh

I've found that I'm bound to wander down that long way road, ohhh
And I realise all about your lies,
But I'm no wiser than the fool that I was before.
I just want you to know something, is that alright?
Baby let's get closer, tonight.

Grant my last request and just let me hold you, don't shrug your shoulders
Lay down beside me
Sure I can accept that we're going nowhere
But one last time let's go there
Lay down beside me, ohhh

Baby, baby, baby
Tell me how can, how can this be wrong?

Grant my last request and just let me hold you, don't shrug your shoulders
Lay down beside me
Sure I can accept that we're going nowhere
But one last time let's go there
Lay down beside me, ohhh

Grant my last request and just let me hold you, don't shrug your shoulders
Lay down beside me
Sure I can accept that we're going nowhere
But one last time let's go there
Lay down beside me, ohhh

ooohhhh wohhhhohhh, yeah
Lay down beside me
One last time let's go there,
Lay down beside me.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Tasmania: Almost an Alcoholic (AA)

I nearly turned into an official alcoholic when I was in Tasmania.

The towns (note: not even a city) were so small and boring, I almost died of boredom. Everything shuts simultaneously as the sun says goodbye. Restaurant's kitchens aren't open after 9pm. There wasn't such thing as late dinner. Pubs were like old folks' home. Streets were dark and empty. We were the only two idiots searching for food and entertainment and Coles was the only place that had their lights on with people breathing in there, only before 12am.

Thanks to our brilliant ideas that took us to the vineyard on the first afternoon, we had heaps of wine in the car boot. On the first night, both of us drank in the room and Mozzie Jo suffered from mild hangover the following day. She was traumatized by any form of alcohol. That means for the remaining 4 nights, I had to drink alone by myself like the second biggest loser.

I finished a bottle of wine by myself every night because there weren't anything else for me to do in town. There were times where I yelled about how bored I was and nothing had changed, still bored. Aaarrrghhhh... if I stayed there for another 2 nights, I'd be a certified alcoholic who drinks alone every night. I finished a bottle of wine before heading for dinner and clubs on Saturday. I was on the verge *shrug*

Melbourne is holding me back to sanity. Thanks Melbourne, I love you!

Do I Look My Age?

I'm currently hooked on this track from a couple of years ago. Thanks to DJ Coming for giving me the CD so I can put it on repeat while driving. Repeat as in repeat for days and sometimes, weeks. So DJ Coming, get ready to burn me another copy as the one you gave me isn't of the best, must be us passing around without cover.

As I was chatting with Jie Shian on MSN, we came to this topic of looking older or younger than your actual age. She was telling me her new boss is highly intelligent with an impressive credential. So I asked if he's hot (like I normally do with every Tom, Dick and Harry). Her answer was negative and she added that he looks like a 46 when he's only 36.

Well, he's smart, uses his brain a lot, works hard and that's probably how he had gotten that 10 years extra on his face, and probably his body. So I said, since I'm a bimbo, don't work hard enough and don't use my brain whenever possible, I'm pretty confident that when I'm 46, I'll look 36. Does it make sense to you?

Then again, looking at the rate I'm going in terms of drinking, partying and staying up till the sunrise, I could be looking like a 46 by 36. If my theory is right, do the math buy adding ten and abstracting ten, I should look 36 when I'm 36, right? Well, if things doesn't work as direct and simple as mathematics, that I won't look younger being a bimbo, that my lifestyle is killing my youthfulness, then I'm in trouble.

Trouble is that I can't decide, whether to enjoy my life and live for today, or preserve myself for the future. Who says I've no stress?

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Good & Bad News

Recently, I've got some cracking good news. Well, it's good news for me, I am not sure about others. I would love to tell the entire world about it but I've learnt that I should only announce the news when all things are 99% confirmed. I can blame that 1% on 'everything is possible' and 'shits happen'. One of the many things that's gonna happen subsequent to this good news - I can get rid of my study table and replace by a new, huge book shelf. Go figure!

Time for bad news - I failed a paper. I didn't hide at the corner to cry as I was pretty much prepared. I was contemplating if I should blog about it and yes, here I am, spilling the truth. The assignment was the one that had gone with my hard drive. I admit that I didn't put much effort in doing it the second time. I was quite embarrassed for myself to have failed a paper after 26 years. Bad luck + own irresponsibility + carelessness - I just have to deal with it. I was upset but what can I do? Talking about it now still upsets me. Let's talk about something else.

So I went for medical check-up today to extend my visa. One of the questions that they asked was Do you consume alcohol? If yes, how much? I said Yes. Socially. That officer insisted that I give her exact quantity I consume per week. For a great 2 seconds, I was shamefully speechless. I thought I shouldn't tell the truth, or perhaps, I didn't know the truth because I don't count and I lose count. So I lied and told her erm... maybe 3 on Friday and 3 on Saturday. I just hope the alcohol from Saturday night is out of my system.

I'm in dire need of self-discipline and quality 12-hour sleep. I'm turning into a bad skin panda with work piling up. The pillow that I couldn't sleep without is getting flat, need a new one but I'm too lazy to hunt one down. Maybe, next week.

Monday, September 03, 2007

Almost Here

Uncertainty definitely isn't my cup of tea.

I was once told by a good friend that uncertainties can be very exciting, you aren't quite sure of the answer and you get the thrill from all these guessing games. I'm an old fart who can't be f*cked with all these crap, I loathe guessing and I hate disappointments. I'm a person who needs to know what's going on, what you're thinking and what is going to happen. I would say I'm not much of a planner but when it involves more than myself, I need to know at least what are the options.

I did ask myself if I'll be upset if things don't turn out to be how I want it to be. Maybe a little but I need to prepare myself at least. Honestly, I am even afraid for time to arrive because I am an idi*t when it comes to dealing with my own feelings. It's a coin toss chance for things to fall in perfect place. I have this vision of what's going to happen but at the same time, I don't even dare to think about these plans. I'm afraid I might have been living in solipsism.

Time dashes pass quicker than I'm prepared for. There were times when I wished it goes by quicker and there are now times where I wish I could turn back time. I also wish candy will always be sweet and the answer would be promisingly happy.

I'm Still Around

I shamelessly confess that I'm addicted to Facebook and it is ruining my life. I'm losing time in studies, work, blogging and sleeping. Alright, I exaggerated a little but it isn't far from the truth. So people were asking me where have I been, that I haven't been blogging. I'm right here, there's no where for me to go, yet!

Life after the snow trip is a chaos. Consequence of being on holiday, almost every two months. So much to accomplish, so little time. And of course, Facebooking didn't make things any better but it does help to keep me entertained when I have no money to get out of the apartment. Oh yeah, I am also badly broke.

On top of being broke, I am trying to save up for a snow trip in Hakuba, Japan in March with the crew. I am seriously hooked to the snow, the slopes, the cold, the chairlift, the skis, the gang and the holiday. I want to go and I want to go bad. Unfortunately, accident happened and I bought a sweater dress, a pair of shoes, a cardigan and a top, all within a week. Well, I did think of returning them because they come up to about 25% of my Melb-Tokyo air ticket but...

I really like them. Anyway, too late now, I've worn almost every piece of them. What I can do now is to eat in more and stop stepping foot in to shops, which is impossible because work requires me to be in them all the time. Aarrrggghhh... saving takes so much effort. I think it could be easier for me to just stay sober in clubs and stare on the floor because that's the place where people usually drop their cash. Yet staying sober is another near impossible state.
So nothing much had happened since I returned from Queenstown except that I've been out drinking quite a bit. Last Friday was mad-arse. I went all out, thinking that I wasn't in Melbourne for 3 weekends and like I promised myself, I went all out! Started drinking on empty stomach at 5pm with Violet and Michele over dinner before rocking up to our Post-Powdered Party at Element Lounge unfashionably late. Nothing much happened at Element except that some people got me tequila worm shot, absinthe, Jaegar bombs, wine, scotch, vodka and more that I can't remember. Everything just went downhill for me after.Rocked up to Watermark and couldn't remember how I made my way there the next day. Hogged the seat next to DJ Coming for the whole period of time that I was in the club. Almost got into a fight with some white chick because she attempted to dance on the speaker that I was sitting on and I didn't like people dancing at where I was sitting. Was fed with more identified drinks and was camwhoring. Highlight was of course the hangover from hell the following day that put in me so much pain, I could only get out of bed at 8.30pm.I've to get back to work and Facebook although I would love to share with you what had happened at the Merdeka party at Damian's. Maybe next time.

Friday, August 31, 2007

Tasmania: the Road Hog Cows

I was in Tasmania with Mozzie Jo for the first time about two months ago. Mozzie Jo got me the air tickets for my birthday. So off the bimbos went on a trip. Two nights in Launceston and three nights in Hobart. Flew in to Launceston and we drove around for the following days in our rented Mitsubishi Outlander. I was the driver and Mozzie Jo was the navigator who couldn't differentiate between right and left, east and west. It was basically a bimbo vs. bimbo situation.At one time while I was driving, a herd of cows was hogging the road and I couldn't go anywhere except for stopping the car. I had never seen so many cows in my way on the road before and I went...

"lock the doors, lock the doors," and I locked the doors. Within seconds I went
"take the camera, take pictures!" and so we did.

Two minutes later, Jo turned to me and said...

"what's with locking the doors? You expect the cows to come over and open our doors and rob us?"

Thursday, August 23, 2007

So Today's Thursday

...and I thought it was Wednesday.

I was buying some flowers at that small little stall at the corner of Toorak Road and another road that I don't know its name. The guy was chatting with me and asked me how was my day.

"man... I'm really tired. Can't believe it's only mid week"
"tomorrow will be the end of the week"
"no, tomorrow's not the end of the week!"
"oh... so you work weekends, don't you?"
"no, I don't"
"so tomorrow's the end of the week for you"
"no, it's not! Another day to go"

I guess he couldn't be f*cked arguing with me and I had no idea that I was confusing him. I got the flowers with two dollars discount, crossed the road and jumped into the car. Not until 5 minutes ago that I realized, tomorrow is the end of the week, it is Friday.

The retard in my class today had gotten me so angry, the fume must've messed up my thoughts. We were having some group work in class, and a person from the group would casually present our idea to the class. I would say that my group members for today were very 'creative' and were full of suggestions. It took us forever to agree with each other on a decision. Well, doesn't matter. When it came to the presentation, this Mr Weird Accent volunteered to present and had decided to ignore our agreed answers and started blabbing his own answers *roll eyes*

The rest of what happened isn't important anymore. I'm exhausted today. And I need to attend a farewell bowling session now when I can't even open my eyes, ppffft!

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

The Real Thing - Gwen Stefani

I was at Gwen Stefani's concert on the Friday before Falls. Performance was only 1.5 hours, a tad too short for the price one had to pay. To be honest, she isn't much of a singer but a great performer. Her performance rocked! And her body, my god... I would die to have a body like hers. Those abs and arms, can you tell that she is a mother?

You're a salty water ocean wave
You knock me down, you kiss my face
I know the storms will always come
But I still love to have you around

Heaven knows what will come next
So emotional, you're so complex
A rollercoaster built to crash
But I still love to have you around

You're the one I want and it's not just phase
You're the one I trust, our love is the real thing
Don't go away
My love (my love)
I want you to stay
In my life
Don't go away
My lover (my love)
I'm happiest when we spend time (it's only you and I)

Exactly how I was feeling on that evening...

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Post NZ Blue

For a person who usually goes to bed at before the sun rises and wakes up a couple of hours before the sun sets, it took her a lot of "inner strength" to get her arse off the bed at 0600 almost every morning. I'm not blowing my own horns but I think I deserve some applauses from everyone for this little achievement.

It was a pain at the beginning of the trip when the alarm went off in the morning. I couldn't help but to snooze it a couple of times before I dragged myself out of bed. Towards the end of the trip, however, I was improving. I didn't have to set my alarm because I would be up once my beloved room mate, Eva, got up. No more whinging about how sleepy I was and how I couldn't opened my eyes.

The trip was awesome with great company and lotsa laughter. Our daily routine usually consists of getting up at 6am, have our breakfast and pack our lunch, ski/board for about 6 hours each day excluding lunch time, starving in the car on the way home while dying to have a Ferg and some vodka/gin/whisky/any form of alcohol, shower, big dinner, drink, drink, drink then sleep and cycle repeats itself. I thought it was one of the healthiest trip I've ever been (despite the drinking and fatty fast food on some nights) as I don't think I've exercise so much after my gymnastics days in primary school and ballet days up till before college. I've somehow managed to shed some pounds although I was eating a high-carb diet every 3 hours (James, you can start laughing at me again!) throughout the trip.

I've practised to let go of things that I used not to be able to - travel light and casual. I did bring a big suitcase but trust me that I've brought much less unnecessary stuff with me. I washed my clothes during the trip. Another thing was that I brought with me NO make-up at all this trip and I couldn't be f*cked whether we're going to fancy restaurants/bars or not. I felt comfortable in my own skin and I thought it was a rare break for myself and my skin. I went partying on the last Saturday in flats and bare face, yet I felt comfortable except for a little hot in my knitted top.

Traveling really does help you know your friends. To be honest, I wasn't 'that' close with this group of monkeys before the trip but I felt like they were my family during the trip. Being in the apartment day and night with 8 people allows you and others to see the real self. Everyone was fun-loving and easy to get along with which made this trip an enjoyable and memorable one. As we were saying "you're my friend if you've seen me after a long day of ski/board-ing - look terrible, sweaty and tired". Very true! In these 11 days, I've learnt that...

1) I can function in the morning (although still quite slow)
2) I can share bathroom with other people
3) I can't cook but I can load and unload dishes in and out of MY washer
4) I can eat as much as I want (or more than usual) and lose weight if I ever care to exercise
5) I can get on a natural high with food
6) Vince can be a talent for hair gel tv commercial
7) we should "put it out there" as taught by CJay
8) James needs ginseng + red bull
9) Eva is still my friend after I embarrassed myself in public
10) Michele, like myself, has to be in the front seats or we will get sick
11) Hye Jin shares a lot of same interest with me, e.g. art and culture
12) Ilya can cook, can ski, can board and can help you up when you fall

Woke up yesterday feeling rather depressed that I'm back in Melbourne and there's no more Cardrona or Remarkables for us. No more packing my sandwiches in my ski jacket, no more Fergs, no more drinking ourselves silly, and no more strolling on the streets of the quaint little Queenstown. Can't wait till the next season and fingers crossed if I get enough $$, Hakuba in Feb/March.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

I Do Sports

My left knee is half dead. It was injured when I was in Falls and the intense exercising that we're doing on the slopes is making it worse. I can't even walk properly. The bruises that I have gotten all over my body aren't as sexy as tattoos unfortunately. One of my fingers is injured and it hurts now when I'm exercising it on my keyboard. Haven't been getting my "minimum 8 hours, ideally 12 hours sleep" at all.

Despite all of those mentioned above, I'm having a ball! I am totally in love with the snow and the slopes. They totally rock and the more I do it, the better I have control over my skis and pick up more speed. From falling and couldn't get up on a green to parallel down the blues made me very happy, really. Now I believe that I can actually do it! Can you believe Lynn actually enjoys sport? I couldn't believe myself.

So when I return to Melbourne, I'll have to start planning to get a bank loan for Hakuba next year. June and Desmond, I can't resist temptations! Can I pick up a couple of thousand on the street next week?

Can't wait for a massage when I return Melbourne, and probably some visits to the physio *frown*

Friday, August 10, 2007

Love from NZ

Greetings from Queenstown!

This charming little town isn't as cold as I had expected it to be. Went on the Milford Sound cruise with the ladies and it was pouring the whole day. We had a good time regardless and I'm now called the Chuckie-without-alcohol-influence #1. I threw up after the almost-5-hour road trip and threw up after the cruise. To solve Michele and my motion sickness problem, we both had to be in the front seat so both of us had to take turns to drive. Not bad at all, better than to puke my way down.

The girls took me to get my first Fergburger in my life. It was, like told by everyone who had tried, very yummy! I had the Fergburger with Swiss cheese today, it was delish but, yes, there is a but, it didn't sweep me off my feet. Cjay reckoned that was because I have not met the 'right' burger. So I'm now on a mission to try as many Fergs as possible on the menu, in search of my Right Burger, that sweeps me off my feet!

Alright, I shouldn't be antisocial. Time to drink as we get to sleep in a little tomorrow before some hardcore skiing next week, which promises 6am up every morning, sob...

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Falls Creek Aug 07

I was up in the snow on the weekend, with Wei Liang, Leroy and May, my new found twin sister. I've to say this is by far the best snow trip (pun intended) for me (okay, I've only been to two!). Snow was good this year and I was doing much better than last year until my idiot friend Wei Liang 'forced' me down a blue run.We had just gotten off the chairlift and he suggested we try a new run before I go for my private lesson in 20 minutes time. So I agreed with him and told him I'm really new and I can't do blue. He said don't worry, he had checked it out, it was too easy, just straight down. Of course it was just straight down, straight, steep and all the way effing down! So I had no choice as I was in the middle of no where, it's either I walked up the slop or skied down. Of course I chose the latter and half way through the 'so exciting' journey, I tumbled down and hurt bad. I got up and attempted to strive my way down to the chairlift that wasn't even in sight at that time. I fell again and again like there were no tomorrow and started cursing like I had never before.

To cut and fuming and hilarious story short. Wei Liang had to carry my skis for me while I walked down and get the chairlift up. I was 30 minutes late for class and there was no money back. I got traumatized and my instructor needed me to practise some 'relaxation exercise' and calmed me down before he could teach me anything new. F*cking Wei Liang, if I had the energy, I would've taken off my ski and hit it straight to your face!

Other than that, the trip was great with good company. May and I met each other a day before the trip through the boys and we couldn't believe how much alike we are. We like the same thing, think similarly, and my birthday is one day after hers in the same year. How bizarre?! Leroy was also a lot of fun although I've met him for 3 years now but we didn't really get to know each other until this trip.

Dinner at Milch was decent with a good bottle of Chardonnay and friendly service. Second night's dinner at our hotel, Attunga was also fabulous.

Kudos to our designated driver, Wei Liang, who didn't even has a sip of alcohol, drove us all back safely in Melbourne in 4.5 hours including the pit stops! We were speeding all the way and the three of us couldn't give two f*cks as we were all smashed from the moment we woke up. We stayed in the hotel lounge and had so much fun eating, drinking and chatting. Good company for sure. The journey home abso-f*cking-lutely rocked! Can't wait to get the pictures on the slopes that are all in Wei Liang's camera as I couldn't be bothered getting my camera out in the cold.