Wednesday, September 29, 2010

I'm supposed to be a tad stronger now

What doesn't kill you will make you stronger. Really? Seriously?

How do you explain my recurring gastro? That hit me hard 3.5 weeks ago, and hit me even harder yesterday. Holy crap... I was literally puking my guts out all day. Anything that went down my throat came straight back out via the same path within 2 minutes. My temperature was going up and down like a swing and the room was spinning around me. I felt freaking pathetic and apparently, I looked very pathetic too! No doubt about that.

So I left work early to go home. But really, I was too sick to even drive yet I was wayyy too tight to cab home and of course, to cab back to work the following day. So I clenched my teeth, and off I drove home. After a quick shower and checked my temperature, I was in bed for the next 15 hours. I had a bit of fever but it didn't really bother me, all I wanted was for me to stop throwing up and feeling sick. Mind you, my electric blanket was on full blast till the early hours. I woke up this morning feeling light-headed (probably because I hadn't had food/water in the last 37 hours) and had a headache (had to be from severe dehydration!). I made myself some plain congee and went to work after.

I missed having someone last night. My mum, a sibling, a boyfriend, a housemate, a visitor, a whatever. I miss my family from time to time but at times like this is when I "physically" missed them. I guess that's my price to pay for living by myself, besides the ridiculous rent. At the end of the day, regardless of how dizzy I was feeling, I still drove myself home. Whether I like it or not, I still have to come home from work and clean up the mess in the kitchen from the morning before. And I had to cook myself food which I've hardly touched because I've zero appetite.

Sucks to be sick! I hope I'll never get sick again, never ever please... Alright, a cough and a sneeze here and there are fine!

Wednesday, September 01, 2010

just another three days

I seriously don't wanna go to work tomorrow. Work has been a huge mess in the last eight weeks. I've lost all motivation and found myself not much of a purpose being there. Reporting to people who don't know what they are doing is just frustrating.

Good news is that I've gotten a new job and I've resigned from this current sh1thole. Three more working days and I'm done. I'm so done!!! To be fair, the bosses are really nice people, as well as other managers. Unfortunately, the person that I've to report to is a walking doll who doesn't do jack sh1t besides making sure that she gets to her hair and massage appointments on time. You get what I mean, don't you?

Anyway, I'm really excited about new job. Not exactly what I wanna do yet but I'm another step closer. I'm so grateful to have thoughtful people around me who never stopped helping me in my career, namely Kimchi and Coldie. In fact, Kimchi hooked me up with last job and this upcoming job. I owe her a big kimchi meal I guess. And Coldie was helping me in many different ways too, as well as giving me really good reference.

Speaking of Coldie. I've been hearing a lot of things about her. People back-stabbing her; how she's a real bitch in the industry, etc. They are probably true, but Coldie has never been mean to me. She's probably been using me too but hey, this is the real world and we're not in that "circle" for fun. So yes, Coldie has my loyalty. She has done the right thing for me, and she has my loyalty. I am not saying that she is a wonderful person with ethic and moral but I am saying she has never done me wrong, so I am not to dislike her. In some way, Coldie has taken me to where I am today in the shortest time and I appreciate that.

Almost half past two in the morning and my eyes are as wide as they can be. Apparently it is raining outside. My kinda weather but right now, I don't feel romantic or sexy at all. All I could feel is resentment at having to work tomorrow. Sigh... three more days, I can do it right? Right? Right! Aaarrgghhh!!!