Thursday, August 07, 2008

I've lost it

I don't know whether it's the weather, or like he said, I've been going through a lot of emotional stress from 'the fine' that I've gotten last Monday - I'm feeling constantly tired. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself, how am I gonna get around? How much money am I willing to spend on cab? How long can I sustain this Monday to Thursday just do it in the day shit? I hate it when it's inconvenient. I like convenience, it's not the best thing for one to progress but convenience has been working well for me.

Finally got myself to look for jobs online today. That's this whole galore of jobs out there, mostly managerial roles that I can't handle. Then there are these beginner roles with job descriptions that I can't seem to fit. So I was speaking with friends and realized they all felt the same when they first started. So I shall just worry if I can perform only after they hire me.

I've been on holiday for six weeks now, I feel like I can't breathe. No, I'm not talking about asthma attack or anything bronchial. I have all these friends to see, and places to be and sometimes I feel like I've not seen my friends for a long time. Like I've not seen Violet for more than a week and I've not seen Diana for a long time. Every evening when Curry Jo calls, I'll be out and busy. Every time when I find time to call mum, it's either too late, or it's dinner time for her. I've not spoken to Eleana since I came back, no chance at all.

Speaking of productivity, I've helped achieved something really important last week - being with Sasha while picking 'the' dress. Yes, yes, yes, my crazy bitch is engaged! Venue is booked and she had picked 'the' dress. She looked absolutely stunning in that dress. We knew it was the one when she stepped out of the changing room. It gives you the 'wow' effect. I can imagine she'll look even more beautiful when the real dress comes in in six months' time because it'll be tailored to her size. Now that the globe is spinning quicker and the sun rises and sets faster than last decade, that day will arrive in no time.

Jo has left Melbourne for indefinitely. Apparently I was so sloshed on Friday night, I was saying things like "I love you, you're my truest friend, can't believe you're leaving, we've a past together, I love you..." in the car. I don't remember but I'm not at all surprise I said that. I love Jo and she really is my true friend and yes, we've a past together and we got through it together. We're also graduating together. I was very busy before she left, I hardly had time for her, I feel like I'm the worst friend ever. Somehow we got to party a couple of times, and we had dinner on the night before she left. I'll see her in Singapore very soon. Globe is spinning in full speed!

I remember Adrian is coming to visit this month but I don't remember the date. Why do people like to visit Melbourne so much? Because it's 'cheap'? Or because there's 'so much' to see here? Alright, I'm starting to sound like I'm complaining. No, I'm happy for all of you guys to visit but I just can't understand. It seems like we ( either myself or my friends) get visitor every month, if not every two weeks. Especially Jevon, his friends are always visiting from Singapore. Now Likai is in town, then Adrian, then mum, and who else? Not to forget Pat's friends, TY's friends. Is Melbourne really that exciting? Don't get me wrong, I love it here. Okay, enough of that before my friends start changing their mind on visiting.

On another note, I've washed, dried and put on my new sheets. 500 egytian, absolutely divine. I love my sheets to be white or red (or family of red). Red is my favourite colour, it's uplifting, it matches my couch, my DVD boxes, my teapot, my new pots and pans, my car and at most times, my nails. White is refreshing, it's clean, pure, it's inviting and calming. White is on now although it's a little too summery for this rainy dark winter. I've something about buying sheets yet I've problem with getting rid of them. I don't use a lot of the old ones now but they are good stuff. I'm a hogger when it comes to sheets but I'm fine with selling my clothes. I don't understand myself sometimes.

Enough of rambling, going to watch some DVD and sleep since I can't get a massage at this time of the night. Strangely, I feel like getting one.

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