Tuesday, January 29, 2008

In these 56 days that I'm in KL...

Things that I've learnt during this trip in KL...

My body can get used to the heat and humidity when I stay here for long enough. I still sweat more than the usual 'locals' but am doing much better than when I first came back. No more sweating like an embarrassing pig.

Gloria Jeans serves decent coffee but they don't do soy which is a pity.

The Market Place's Happy Hour draught beer is darn cheap - RM30(AUD10)nett per jug. God damn it, bring on the beer, forget about the cocktails!

Banquet at Bangsar Village 2 is run by the same owners of the successful Cafe Cafe and the food wasn't too bad.

Nasi Lemak is still the best national breakfast, besides Bak Kut Teh. Awwww... hello fat!

There are heaps of cheap yamcha places around but there's not a place that serves good dimsum.

Beer served during Happy Hour at Happy Hour's price are watered down.

The heroic move of mixing beer, cheap red wine and stout within 3 hours after staying clear from alcohol for a month is a surefire way to make you throw up all the way from the bar to home...

...then you can keep throwing up till 6pm the following day although there's literally nothing left in your stomach.

Women can be ooohhh-ing and ahhhh-ing over their girl's wedding that is scheduled at least 12 months away; men, my man to be specific, would say... "what is there to be excited about? It's 12 months away. Get excited when it's a week away. Well... Men are from Mars, so they said.

You can hate your job but love going to work because you've got great colleagues who lighten up the whole working environment.

Emotional pain can be physical. It can turn into this sharp twisting pain in your heart, that makes you lose your appetite, unable to sleep, and sometimes unable to even cry.

Playing mahjong for 8 hours straight is so much fun but working straight for 8 hours would be painful.

You'd want to be a better person and swallow your anger, pride, and ego when you love someone enough, but definitely not your dignity.

I've also learnt that, regardless of how much tears one shed, how hard one tries, there are things that it out of your control, and sometimes, out of reach. So whoever that smart arse is that said 'the world is yours if you strive hard enough', isn't quite true.

*yawn* way past my bed time and another long day watching some crappy TV programs at work tomorrow. Good night, people. Be back soon, xoxo

Friday, January 25, 2008

7x7

It's been 49 days. I was told he'll eventually forget about us and start his new life after death. Is that true? Is there really life after death? I believe so because I honestly can feel his presence sometimes. Is that possible for Dad to forget about us so quickly? I am not ready for that. I feel safe everyday knowing that he's around, protecting us. I feel comfortable knowing that he's around, guiding me. If today's the last day he's around with us, what am I gonna be tomorrow? I've to admit that I might be too weak to keep going without Dad.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Sweeney Todd

I'm not eating meat pies for at least a month. I love pies and I'm one who would take a drive to Mt. Dandenong to Pies in the Sky for brunch. When I was hungry in the middle of the night, I thought of pies with chunky bits of meat soaked in thick gravy within the thin chewy pastry. I have tasted the best pie in Richmond, this quaint little town between Launceston and Hobart in Tassie. However, I'm not eating pies for at least a month. I'm all grossed out after watching Sweeney Todd last night.

This visionary brainchild of Tim Burton was beautiful although the broken arms/legs/fingers scenes made my stomach churned. Actually, I was feeling rather disturbed when the idea of making pies with Portelli's meat struck Mrs. Lovett. Johnny Depp's acting was awe-inspiring, he definitely deserved the Best Actor award. Half of my colleagues didn't like the musicals in the movie but I thought that has partially made the movie so beautiful, besides its wardrobe and props. This human-butchering movie soundtrack will definitely be on my shopping list. I personally see it as a movie about love, a not so romantic, dark, cold, and bloodcurdling kinda love movie. All things in the movie happened because of love, or perhaps, lust!

It was good that I've watched it with friends because Candyman wouldn't be interested in any human-butchering movie regardless whether it's Burton's, Depp's or me!

Am so glad that it's holiday tomorrow. Hopefully I can get myself an appointment for a massage. Happy Thaipusam peeps!

Monday, January 21, 2008

it was the weekend

The weekend was filled with both really sad and some good news.

After 9 months of fighting back and struggling, sis-in-law’s dad has finally left them. He was in a lot of pain before his death. He is now, like my Dad, free from pain although he was very much unwilling to leave. In his last days, he couldn’t help but to question himself why he has gotten this disease. No one had the answer, not the doctor, not the nurse, not the monk, and definitely not the family. I guess the answer to that was at no use but doing your least to help people around you to cope a little easier was more important.

Dad was very thoughtful in this sense. He had tried his best to explain to us, especially me, that his going-away was inevitable. The only difference was that he would be able to leave in peace if we understand and accept the fact. We understood, but grief is also inevitable. He wanted to put us in as little pain and trouble as possible before and after his death; not wanting us to worry too much about him and gotten most things planned for us, including his own funeral. He wanted us to be happy, to get going in life, and continue to be better person. We are learning and trying as time passes.

On a happier note, two of my friends are going to be mummy in the third quarter of this yea. Another friend has just gotten engaged and these other two are getting hitched at the end of this year. Big congratulations! I am expecting more good news from those around me. While many around reckon that we’ve come to age of settling down a.k.a. getting married and having babies, I’m still feeling rather erm… young! On one hand, I would like to be with the person I love dearly and start a family, on the other hand, I’m not done with what I’m having. I’m enjoying my life and time with boyfriend, friends, work and travel, I’m not ready to commit to starting my own family and being responsible for my kids, yet. So my dream of getting married and have my first kid before the big-3 isn’t going to happen, although sometimes I’m secretly wishing for that deep down inside. Just sometimes.

My weekend was after all an eventful and happy one, despite getting absolutely sloshed on Friday. Leaving some stinky mess of puke on the outside of my car for my maids to clean up, I’m rather embarrassed. Big thank you to Rodney who took me home (by no choice). The 7-hour mahjong session with mum and aunt V gave me some extra pocket money. I’ve finally beat the two veterans who have been taking too much tuition fees from me. Also finally gave Foong Lye Taiwanese restaurant a try after hearing all good things about the place. It was, like I had expected, very impressive. I think my Dad would love the fish head hotpot. Can’t wait to take Candyman there on his next visit.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Happy Thursday

I’m happy today. I’m happy, happy, happy!!! It is always true for myself that I am chirpier when I’m well-dressed. So I shall not be lazy for even a day and leave home in daggy clothes.

Working environment here is amazing. Colleagues are absolutely cheerful and helpful. I’m glad that I’ve brought laughter to the office although they’re complaining that I’m making too much noise here. At the same time, they’ve given me sunshine during gloomy days.

Drinks and dinner with the girls at The Market Place soon. Something that I’ve been looking forward too since I got up. I’m leaving work, RIGHT NOW!

Monday, January 14, 2008

One Night in KL

Had the best weekend since I'm back. Candyman visited and has brought a lot of joy and laughter to the family and of course, me. I went out for the first time after 36 days, as in all dressed up kinda go out. Didn't party as am still not in the right mood to party. We had a great dinner at Rococo style Café Café on Saturday, with beautifully prepared food and an amazing bottle of Guigal. It was a very Frenchy evening.

Drove around the city after dinner, attempting to show off my Malaysian girl knowledge but wasn't very successful. I couldn't find the way to Dataran Merdeka and I wasn't aware that the brothel strip off Jalan Bukit Bintang has moved. Traffic in the city at midnight was ridiculous. Barflies were stuck in traffic impatiently while the police closed off most lanes to hunt down the Mat Rempits. Lotsa stupid jokes and laughter during that 60-minute car ride. Going home and cuddle each other to sleep was a total bliss.

Just wondering when can we do that every weekend, when both live in the same city and live the same life?

Friday, January 11, 2008

Should, really?

Got to work with a barf-worthy headache and almost an hour late, 8 hours sleep was definitely not enough. Seeing faces that I despise hanging around at home is a surefire way to ruin my morning. Fun-loving people at work, however, would never fail to put a smile on my face, although it is pretty quiet today with the noisiest person enjoying the sun, sea and sex in Bali.
My headache was coffee related. All things are fine after lunch after I got a shitty cup of coffee. These two weeks made me realized that soy milk isn’t a common thing in KL. Besides Starbucks, I’ve not yet found another place that serves soy latte, and Starbucks coffee sucks to the max. Got Dome’s today, it tasted okay but it burnt my tongue. I hate it when baristas can’t get the temperature right; it puts me off when the coffee burns my tongue when I’m desperately in need of caffeine kick.
Sometimes I hate myself for being rude to people who love and care about us. This person, who I cannot agree with what she had done before and after Dad’s death annoys the shit out of me, regardless of how hard she has been trying. It doesn’t take a genius to tell that I’m not happy with her, and that she’s trying very much to please me. I can only try my best and all I’ve achieved is to be civilized with her. If it wasn’t for Dad and knowing that she loves me dearly, I would’ve been worse. Hopefully it is just a phase that I’m going through, it would be better the next time we see each other. The next time, could probably means years later.
There are people who said to me…
that my mum has only a son and a daughter, that I shouldn’t stay in Australia and should return right after I finish my masters.
S-H-O-U-L-D.
Am I being selfish by pursuing the life I want? Maybe, I am. Or maybe, not. One moment I tell myself that I’ve already tried my best. I’ve stopped my life for 3 months to be with family, leaving work in Melbourne irresponsibly and cancelled all plans. I can’t put my entire life on hold for that. At other times, I question myself whether I’m making the right decision. Yes, things had happened and we have to move on with life but maybe I should take my family into deeper consideration during decision making. It’s my life but my family is an important part of my life too.
Are there really things that I SHOULD do and I SHOULD not do?